Even in the depths of sin, hope comes through the Savior. Don't give up, and don't give in to despair.
I read an article the other day about a young woman who was the victim of sexual abuse at the hands of her high school teacher. Her parents, who were already devastated, are broken-hearted because she is convinced that she is meant to be with this teacher (who is now in prison), and she apparently has come to despise her parents because they
won’t let her be with him. She has left home, she smokes and drinks and does drugs (whereas she apparently
didn’t do so before), and she won’t talk to her parents. Apparently she has gone a little wild in these and other ways.
It is my opinion that this unfortunate girl believes that she is lost and damned forever, and that it
doesn’t matter anymore what she does with her life. I believe that, despite her apparent devotion to her abuser, deep down she feels as if she is a sinner because of what he did to her.
Firstly, I would like to declare unequivocally that victims of abuse (sexual or otherwise) are just that:
victims. Despite feelings of guilt and shame that accompany such abuse,
the victim is never responsible for the abuse,
and they are certainly not guilty of sin where the abuse is concerned. I cannot state this strongly enough. When I was a child I was the victim of long-term physical and emotional abuse, and I was informed by several of my fellow church members on several separate occasions that I should not have provoked my abuser, or they merely made implications that there must have been something wrong with me because I was abused. More often I was just treated like a liar because they did not want to believe that this person that they knew and respected could beat his wife and children.
The actions of these church members were in complete disharmony with the stated policy and doctrine of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, as explained on the official church website
lds.org:
“Victims of abuse should be assured that they are not to blame for the harmful behavior of others. They do not need to feel guilt. If they have been a victim of rape or other sexual abuse, whether they have been abused by an acquaintance, a stranger, or even a family member, victims of sexual abuse are not guilty of sexual sin.”
It is not my intention to dwell on the issue of abuse today (
a subject for another day perhaps). I chose to share this tragic story in order to examine the self-destructive choices that are being made by a girl that is undoubtedly confused and hurting in the wake of this horrendous incident. The reason I chose to address this subject today is that the story of this unfortunate girl who is making a whole slew of bad choices in the wake of what she apparently perceives to be one major sin (as I stated above, she didn't commit a sin, but she doesn't understand that), is altogether too common. As I read her story, I was strongly reminded of people that I know and have known who feel that they are hopeless cases who are beyond the reach of the Savior. I speak now of those people who generally have not been abused but rather who, through their own human weakness, have committed a serious sin, and instead of seeking the solace of forgiveness through repentance and the atonement of Jesus Christ, they choose instead to sink deeper and deeper into sin. I see this happening around me almost continually. I have friends who, for whatever reason, have fallen into the depths of transgression. Some of them have managed to find their way back to happiness and righteousness, others still struggle with sin, and still others may never free themselves from the snare of sin. Some of my friends and
acquaintances have become so hardened, through sin, that they might not come back even if they felt like they could. Many of these people were raised in good homes in which they were taught the principles of the Gospel, and yet they have chosen to reject all that they learned as a child. What motivates such a departure from what they must know is good and right?
